There’s a saying: Opinions are like assholes—everyone’s got one.*
Well, blogs are like assholes with opinions.
There are exactly a gazillion blogs in the blogosphere. Each one emitting 5,000 tons of thought pollution a year. At this rate, intelligent thinking will be impossible within 20 miles of any wi-fi hot spot by 2060.
And of those gazillion, I’ve read exactly a handful**. Of those handful, only one is worth reading.
Most are poorly written. More than a few are goddamn preachy. Some are pushed out by shills. A lot are written by people who are probably very funny in their minds.
The only one worth reading is one that makes every “Top Blog” list all the time. So if you were hoping to be treated to a hidden gem, I’m sorry to disappoint you on top of all the other regular disappointment you feel reading what I write. The blog to read is The Bloggess.***
I didn’t always like the Bloggess. In fact, I stubbornly refused to read her blog because everyone was telling me that I should read it. With that attitude in my head, I read her for the first time. The post was all about how she was using a 5-foot metal chicken to screw with her husband. It annoyed me. Because I’m above such nonsense.
But then I thought, “okay, I’m trying to get something going with J+JWUTH**** so I better do my homework, including reading as many blogs as possible. I read mommy blogs, daddy blogs (those really suck, I’m sorry, they do), and humor blogs. Since the Bloggess appeared on every damn list in every damn search result, I felt obligated to try her out again.
And of course, I liked what I read. Maybe it was because I was reading her for homework and therefore I was more objective. Maybe it was reading her after reading all the other garbage out there that made her stand out by comparison. Maybe it was the fact that she is just a very funny, complicated, thoughtful person who knows exactly how much to write and how to write. Whatever the reason, I was developing a new appreciation for her, and climbing down off of my high horse.
If you went to those posts, you may or may not have been as blown away as I was. But I really connected with what she wrote and, considering the vast number of comments she gets, so do a lot of people.
Those posts are examples of blogging done perfectly. They are human. They tear down walls. They demonstrate what communication is all about: connecting to an idea, a person. They show that all along behind the Bloggess there was Jenny Lawson. And she was never hiding. She was just trying to be Jenny Lawson. On a blog. The lists and accolades and worship and imitation (holy shit the imitation—so many bloggers are trying to be her and failing in very non-funny ways) were all imposed on her, side effects of authenticity.
And she deserves every bit of it. It’s great when the good guys win.
*depending on who you married, you might have two.
**this blog is among that handful.
***Now she can say she came in first on a list of 1 featured on a blog with a readership of approximately 1. I know she was dying for this endorsement.
****holy shit is that pretentious